BAH HUMBUG

Christmas is upon us, and all I can say is thank goodness it only comes once a year. As for it being the most wonderful time of the year – well I beg to differ. I don’t know why or when I started to dislike the holiday season – I loved it as a child and I can think of no major upset around this time of year that would make me feel negatively towards it – but I honestly find it very hard to buy into the whole Christmas spirit thing. Maybe it’s because I’m not too fond of winter time. I prefer the warmer months, to feel the sun on my skin, to hear the birds singing, to be able to get out in the garden. The colder months are just that little more depressing, shorter and colder days that leave me feeling more than gloomy. I don’t totally hate winter, it does have some positives, I like a brisk walk in the woods at this time of year, I like to see the patterns of frost and ice, and it’s lovely to close the curtains of an evening and snuggle up with a book a good movie; but generally this time of year makes me feel despondent. Winter just feels like an ending, which I suppose it is in a way albeit temporarily – less wildlife to be seen, flowers and plants disappear for a while – but logically this shouldn’t bother me as I know spring and summer will follow as usual. All is as it’s meant to be. I wonder whether it’s a biological thing, passed on down through the ages – after all, once upon a time us humans would have truly feared this time of year as it meant less food, little warmth and the inevitable death of some in our community. It’s why so many cultures across the northern hemisphere have celebrations and festivals at this time of year (think Samhain/Halloween, Diwali, Yule, Christmas even) there purpose being to celebrate the triumph of light over dark – most likely originally the triumph of spring over winter, of the promise of better days to come.
So in theory Christmas should be a positive highlight of the winter months, but try as I might I can’t get into the spirit of things. Even when my children were young I found it hard and I had hoped having a grandchild would improve my feelings regarding the holiday, but nope. I have decked the halls and put up a tree – which promptly fell down. Twice. That didn’t help my mood. But then the Christmas tree rarely does. Sure, I love the twinkly lights and I love it’s pagan roots (if you pardon the pun) when evergreen branches were brought into the home in the winter months to symbolise light and life, but for me the Christmas tree just sets off my OCD. As pretty and as sparkly as it is, I will now spend the next few weeks unable to sit quietly because it is looming over me, it’s baubles unaligned, baubles of the same colour too close together, the ribbons at the wrong angle, the lights not quite right. The anxiety it gives me. When it fell down maybe I should have left it there.
And please. Do not get me started on Christmas music. Now, I quite like the odd carol despite being a non-believer, and as a child and adult, I loved to hear the Salvation Army play. One of my fondest memories of Christmas is hearing the distant sound of brass instruments playing carols and rushing out into the dark and cold, down the garden path to wait for them to arrive at our gate – they stopped and played under every light and played a carol – Hark the Herald Angels Sing, O Come All Ye Faithful, The First Noel, Silent Night. It was magical. And I quite like the odd Christmas pop song – Eartha Kitt’s Santa Baby, Ella Fitzgerald’s Santa Claus Got Stuck In My Chimney, Wham and Last Christmas, and my personal favourite The Pogues and Fairy Tale of New York. But certain other songs have me running from shops, switching off the radio, more often than not in tears of misery (Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, I’ll Be Home For Christmas) or just in pain at how awful they are (anyone who has been shopping in, for example, a certain German supermarket, may sympathise here. Maybe they’re trying to keep the queues down). And the adverts and push to make us spend and spend and spend, to try and outdo each other. Ridiculous. Talking of adverts, there’s one for a very famous drink that involves a lorry and mentions that the holidays are coming: just wondering, does anyone else have to run out of the room so as not to hear or witness it when this comes on the TV or is it just me?! It gives me the shivers. Probably just me.
But perhaps my biggest gripe about Christmas is the insincerity. Suddenly, for a few weeks of the year everyone is ‘happy Christmas’ and all best buddies. Come the New Year we’ll be back to being anti-social again, ignoring one and other save for the odd scowl and glower. I don’t want top wish the days away but bring on January – the tree and the decorations will be down, the coercion from retailers to spend will be dialled down, the Christmas music will disappear, and it will be safe to leave the house once more.
So on that note, Happy Christmas or should that be bah humbug?

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